Well the first half of the 2014 season has come to a close with little fanfare; at least for Rangers fans. I think we could all use four days “off”, am I right?
The Rangers have lost 9 of their last 10 games and that’s absolutely no fun. But, I figure, if the team won’t be fun, we can make our own fun…dang it!
So here you have this…a quiz: What kind of Rangers fan are you?
Don’t you just love all of the Buzzfeed quizzes on Facebook? Why not have one of our own? Ready?
Below are your questions. Count up you’re A’s, B’s, Cs, and D’s to find out just which kind of Rangers fan you are.
Yay! We’re having fun again!
1. The Rangers are down 3-2 at home, going into the bottom of the 9th inning, you think to yourself:
|A. Dang, we have the bottom part of the order up. Hopefully we can etch out a run. Either way, at least Yu pitched a good game.|
|B. We’ll just have to walk it off! Let’s go Adam Rosales…hit that home run!|
|C. Buncha schmucks. They’re gonna lose like they always do.|
|D. I don’t know. Did they win yesterday?|
2. The Rangers acquire a big bat in…let’s just say…Prince Fielder.
|A . You jump for joy that Jon Daniels is trying to bolster the weak offense. But realize that there are plenty other fixes to make for the team to be a contender.|
|B. You’re pretty sure that Prince will hit 64 home runs to right field. And maybe 10 more to left.|
|C. This is the worst move EVER. Prince Fielder?! What’s he ever done? What was JD thinking?|
|D. Prince Fielder is the best! Well…unless The Ticket says otherwise.|
3. Tom Grieve is talking about cookies again.
|A. Can we get back to the game?|
|B. Cookie talk! Good ol’ Mildred from Pampa, TX. TAG’s the best.|
|C. I hate cookies. This is why everyone is fat!|
|D. I love cookies. But why is TAG talking about them now? I hate TAG. Stupid Rangers they suck tonight. OOH! A home run!|
4. It’s February and pitchers and catchers report in a few days.
|A. You’re SO excited that baseball is back! You also wonder when the spring games will start to be televised.|
|B. You can’t WAIT to hear from the Mayor of Surprise, AZ on the telecast! In fact, you hope he gets two innings to speak this year!|
|C. You’re pretty sure the Rangers are gonna lose 100 games this year. There’s basically no way around it. If not 100, at least 90.|
|D. The Rangers sucked last year. That means they’ll suck again this year. Who wants my “ducks on a pond” t-shirt? OOH! We got Prince Fielder?!|
5. Derek Holland “trips over his dog”.
|A. You think he’s a huge goofball with lots of talent.|
|B. Aww, he’s a dog lover! I have a boxer too!|
|C. You are pretty sure you know who “Dumber” is now.|
|D. You’re not sure what to think. It’s the preseason. I’ll decide when the team starts winning…or losing.|
Okay, Rangers fans…tally ‘em up!
Rusty Greer – You’re die-hard. Good team, bad team…doesn’t matter. You’ll dive into a wall and wreck your insides to show your support. You’re there watching every game for a 10-game losing streak, the World Series, and everything in between. Bravo! (Also…you know who Rusty Greer is)
Nelly Cruz – You’re a nice guy. But you’re a little delusional. We know you love your team, but they just can’t be good every year. It’s not possible. You hear “20 games under .500” and you just think playoffs sound like a challenge. PLAYOFF BOUND! Unfortunately, much like Nelly himself, you’ll be hit by an $8 million deal…er, reality check right in the face. Not to fear, we love your optimism. But sometimes, you gotta keep it real.
Alex Rodriguez – You’re a Debbie Downer. Rangers lose the game? “Eh, I told you they suck”. Rangers win the ALCS? “Eh, they’ll lose it in the World Series”. Remember the guys in Major League that sat in the outfield and called Rick Vaughan “Vile Thing”? Yeah, that’s you. Except we all know why you’re doing this. You don’t want to get hurt. We understand. But have some faith. We’ll be good again!
Vicente Padilla – You’re a loose cannon! Up and down, up and down. We don’t know what to expect from you! Rangers are winning and you’re like “GO RANGERS!” Rangers are losing and you’re jumping off the bandwagon faster than we can say claw and antlers. Pull yourself together! And take some cues from Rusty Greer up there.
See? We make our own fun.
Enjoy the Home Run Derby tonight!
95 down, 67 to go.
Your Texas Rangers are 38-57.